The unofficial poet of Gibsons, Margaret Jones, phoned me recently to say that she was as excited as "a flea in a blanket."
She had published a small book of her verse and stories called Crafty Comedy in Rhyme and Pantomime. Anyone who has heard Jones declaim her ditties at various venues such as Harmony Hall or has read her entertaining, rhyming letters to Coast Reporter will know she is hilarious.
Crafty Comedy, brought to print by All in the Family Publishing Company (her son in Coquitlam) has reprised some of her funnier poems including a few that would make great country music tunes, such as Going Topless - The Bottom Line, sung to the folk tune of Comin' Round the Mountain. Yes, the poem covers -or uncovers -just what you think it does.
Jones, now in her 80s, is at her best with her reflections on life, particularly the advent of technology.
"Oh telephone, oh telephone -a gadget so fantastic, but if nobody answers it, it's just a chunk of plastic." The poem goes on to describe the lack of communication inherent in today's supposedly progressive services such as voice mail and toll free numbers. Another poem takes a wry look at the process of growing old. In The Golden Years, she writes: "Those signs that say 'five-minute parking'/depend on how speedy you are;/ For me it takes more than five minutes/ to heave myself out of the car."
The wee book also includes a typical Jones' perspective on fairy tales. The story of Hansel and Pretzel describes two children's efforts to rid the world of a wicked witch, while BlondiLocks and the Bear-Blended Family recounts the story of poor Blondie who is tired of living in Port Watermelon and finds herself a new bungalow inhabited by three bears. Just as it appears Blondie will provide the bears with a tasty low-cal lunch, she is saved by Momma bear's memory that all fitness freaks are indigestible.
This good pantomime fodder is probably at its best when read out loud, as Jones is fond of doing. Though her profession was nursing, she has always participated in drama productions and has won two awards for her amateur performances.
Crafty Comedy is available at Coast Books in Gibsons for $5. While this is the first such book for Jones, Roberts Creek poet Jack Hood has finished his sixth volume of poems -this one called Ponderings. HeÊtries to write a poem every day, he once told me, and only a small portion of the thoughts have found their way into books. Hood also displays a wry wit but leans more towards wisdom, the kind of knowledge that comes with the years.
"Don't sweat the small stuff," he says in one poem, then goes on to ask: "Just what is the 'big stuff'? First educate, then feed; Be the best role model; Stamp out excessive greed."
Both of the elder poets offer opinions on war; their philosophies seem to agree. Hood ponders this thought in the poem War Again!: "While soldiers sleep and mothers weep, the question remains -What for?" In The Scars of War, Jones writes, "A child is maimed in Baghdad while he plays a simple game. He won't forget these bombers -strangers with a deadly aim."
Some of Hood's previous volumes are still available at Hallmark Cards in Sunnycrest Mall, mostly they have sold quickly, by word of mouth. One day, he hopes to bring out a collection of his favourites from each of the six volumes.
