Family meals, where the whole family sits around the table sharing food and conversation, can seem like an old-fashioned concept.
Whatever your personal experience, there is a lot of truth in the benefits of a family eating a meal together. Whatever form the family, there is much evidence that family meals are beneficial and help to create healthy eating habits from an early age.
Adults who eat regular family meals have been found to eat better and to be healthier in general. This holds true for children under the same circumstances; they also tend to have greater self-esteem. And this extends beyond the family as these children also get along easier with other people and do better in school.
That all sounds very good, but how do you go about having regular family meals? After all, we are so busy, as are our children and “getting all of us around the table….” The excuses are many, but there are ways to make it happen. You can start by focussing on the ‘how’ first, then the “what.”
Meals do not have to be big affairs with elaborate menus and napkins. Instead, meals can be as simple as pizza or sandwiches — any meal eaten together during the day is good. The important thing is to all sit down together and share it at regular meal times.
A well-regarded source of information for this subject is the Ellyn Satter Institute (www.ellynsatterinstitute.org), which has studied feeding and eating, introducing what they call the “Division of Responsibility” of feeding. The key message is that the parent decides the what, when and where of eating and the child decides if and how much they will eat from what is offered.
Here are some practical suggestions to get you started with family meals:
Start by offering a variety of healthy foods for children to choose from. Parents demonstrate trust and respect in their children by letting them eat enough from the food offered.
Always offer something familiar with any new foods that you introduce. You might be introducing curry that is new, so serve up plenty of rice or flat bread, too.
Encourage children to try different foods, but don’t force them to eat foods they are not comfortable with. At the same time, you can’t always please everyone at the table; just make sure to provide at least one or two items they generally enjoy.
This one we can all relate to: meal times should be pleasant. Try to stay away from distractions like screens (television, phones, computers, games). This small change allows for the opportunity to make positive conversation during the meal.
One cautionary note: avoid using food as reward or punishment. Food is meant to nourish. Including children in meal planning, preparation and cleaning up helps them to learn the process of meals and helps them bond, much like the conversation and togetherness of the meal.
Family meals are good for everyone involved. They allow us to enjoy a variety of foods; provide a time and place to ‘do the work of the family’; and they teach children patience, table manners and acceptance. That family meals can make everyone healthier, too, is a bonus.
Editor’s note: Dr. Paul Martiquet is the medical health officer for rural Vancouver Coastal Health including Powell River, the Sunshine Coast, Sea-to-Sky, Bella Bella and Bella Coola.
